PlazaJen: Passion Knit

Stephanie has been telling me how great the Ritz Chips are (raving about them, actually) and I just sort of nodded & went "uh-huh" - but today, she has been validated. They are awesome! The remind me a little of the ol' Chicken in a Biskit, texture wise. But they're much crunchier. I like crunchy things.
I am ready for lunch.

Got my car. I am so exhausted with this experience, I feel like putting it all down will just make me need to go back to bed. I'll topline it, and acknowledge that looking back at my anger, I admit I'm channelling some "other" anger into the situation. However, in my defense, I really dislike alarmist car service men, and the facts do support I was being treated this way because I'm a woman. ARGH!
At 5:00 I got a call saying they wanted to KEEP MY CAR some more. He'd already installed four new fuel injectors into it. (Methinks this was an overreaction!) We argued back and forth over the fuel situation. I read to him from the ethanol website the facts of how a high ethanol fuel can trigger some cars' computer emission detection systems. John was pacing outside my office, because we had a very synchronized after-work process already in place to go to HIS car dealership, in his roommate's truck, and then I would follow him, driving his truck, out south to my dealership. (He had two trucks, I had none. More on driving a truck later!) Anyhow, fifteen minutes of me losing my temper on the phone resulted in them giving up MY CAR. He actually said, "Your car is sick. I need to find out what's making it sick." Here's the amazing part. We got there right at 6:00 (phew!), and I made John go in with me. I swear the resulting experience was different because a MAN was standing next to me, and that makes me NUTTY-O! Suddenly we're all calm about me taking the car. We're fine - and the light that wouldn't go off - it's now off! The fuel injectors are now firing at the correct whatevers. See, honestly, I don't care. It's a Honda. They are not known for lemons. So what they want me to do is drive the car until I use up the current tank of fuel, then put mid-premium fuel in for the next tank. Oooooookaaaaay.......? I just wanted my car so I was not in any state to be quizzing him, but John said exactly what I was thinking (oh, and I forgot to mention that the majority of the conversation about my car took place towards John's head - the first minute he did it, I started to smirk & it was all I could do not to bust out laughing. so transparent!) - back to what I was thinking: "So why didn't you siphon out the fuel?" (if said fuel was the culprit and problem? and it took some stammering & jumping around, first referencing that I'd already paid for the fuel - hello, if I bought a really nice Wusthof knife, and accidentally jammed it into my thigh? I don't care about the fact I bought the knife, it's in my leg & it shouldn't be, let's take it out! - and then he finally had to say the fuel was not harming my car. Excellent, and I have a witness. I suspect he called Iowa to discuss ethanol fuel, because - duh - everybody in Iowa drives on ethanol. Long story summed up: got my car, only had to pay for the exorbitantly-priced services I'd already agreed to, and now I am turning over the Car Maintenance portion of this marriage over to James. Yay!
Driving a Ford-150 pickup truck was both nerve-wracking & fun. I am too confident sometimes about things, which is usually followed by terror flashes that in my confidence I'm missing something really basic & apparent. Like will the back end of this giant pickup go crazily skidding across another lane of traffic when I go around the fountain circle? YIKES! (It doesn't, at least not at 35 mph) I felt self-conscious because John was right in front of me, and it's his truck. I also didn't feel terribly secure in knowing where I was in the lane, like centered vs. hugging one side or the other, because a Civic is lower to the ground & I'm used to it's size. But it definitely was fun to drive & be up high, I see why everybody buys SUV's, it's just unfortunate they're such gas guzzlers and oh say killer vehicles if they hit someone in oh say a Civic.
Well, hey, it's Saturday, Princess Day of the Week, and I'm gonna enjoy some hot wings that my sweetie brought be back from Hooters. Love the wings, think the dining-in experience is sorta stupid. At least they don't pretend to be a family restaurant. Honesty is scarce in America, especially at a car dealership.

OK, those mother-F'ers at my Honda dealership are in big trouble. Alarmist fascist pigs trying to take advantage of the fact I am a woman, and that I could have possibly, irreparably caused DAMAGE to my freakin' ENGINE by using ETHANOL based fuel in it. Oh, mah god. Because I radio edit not only for workplace particulars, but also extreme language, here is what I think of them, and it is NC-17 and not very nice to read.

Pissed


And I had to leave my car overnight, so I'm still relying on the kindness of OTHERS and my schedule is dependent on them - who knows how I'm getting back home & to my car tonight! sheesh. And I'm going to have to wrangle with them ALL over again today on the phone, but hopefully now that I'm white-hot poker pissed, I will not feel the terror I felt yesterday that I had done very expensive, non-warranty-covered damage. OH. I must not revisit this for a while or I will keel over from my blood pressure spiking.

Finally, Friday. Bless you, Friday, the second runner-up in the Pageant of Days. If Saturday should lose her crown due to salacious photos surfacing from her youth, and then Sunday decides to improperly get drunk at a publicity appearance, you, dear Friday, will be the one to take over the role of Happiest of Days.
We promise, no swimsuit competitions.

To the untrained eye, I look like Chaos. Swirling, piling, heaps of unorganized STUFF. Martha Stewart would shudder indelicately at this Life Lived Untidily.
However. Within the chaotic storm still lies a deep-seated need for order. A little obsessive-compulsiveness surfaces every so often, much like a bluegill ripples the surface of the water as it eats the bug that has landed in the wrong place at the wrong time.
I have not done a good job of lunching this week. Today, I did not eat lunch, but instead consumed about 3 handfuls of Chex Mix, followed by an equal amount of mustard-flavored pretzels. Five minutes ago, I just poured a "serving" of Mike-N-Ikes out on my desk. And I was eating them two at a time, which is how I always eat candy at my desk: Gummi bears, Hot Tamales, all the chewy types. I lasted less than a minute, randomly grabbing pairs of bolus-shaped sugar bombs, and then all the flavors had to be sorted. Into like flavor groups, and paired up. The pairs are then eaten, in ascending order, from least-favorite flavor, to most favorite flavor. (each side of the mouth then has a symmetrical, candy-consuming experience.) I am not as obsessed with the M-n-I flavors as I am with gummis, or Starbursts, so it was less of a hierarchical structure to adhere to. Whew! When a certain pairing is off by one, then the odd-candy-out is paired up with the next flavor in the lineup. With M&M's, they are eaten by least favorite color to prettiest color.
I do not like juice from my beans to touch my pork chop. I don't go so far as to have cafeteria trays in my house, but I like things to occupy their own space and not drip into their neighbor's. It messes with the flavor & expectation for the eating experience.
I like consistency. I like having a known "base" for my expectations & experiences. There are always things that are uncertain, all these factors over which I have no control. Maybe pairing up my candy & creating some sort of "order" under which the candy is consumed is my effort to control my own universe......... wouldn't it be great if I challenged some of that energy into a little more cleaning?!?
Oh, and everyone on my team now thinks I'm utterly insane because I told them that I'm afraid to be around little people because I worry I will be compelled by some unknown force to try & pick them up. This is in the same drawer as the irrational fear that when I am around a police officer, I will lose all control & try to get his (her) gun out of their holster.
Now THAT would be spontaneous!

I have to admit it. Face it, Trace it, Erase it. I have a thing for the Beastie Boys, and it's not an ordinary thing. Not like "oooooh, Marky Mark/Denzel/Usher, he SO hot." it's more like a queasy, Oh my god, I could give up my entire life to clean your apartment, and I can't even pick between the three of you so I'll clean all your apartments. (Mike D, I am afraid you'd make me live in a box under your bed, but I'll still take that chance.)
They are the Uber-Geeks who Hit the Big Time (not on the scale of Bill Gates, but please. GeekLove has its limits.) I've always had a thing for geeks. Bobby Melvin in 8th grade. Big round owlish eyeglasses, and short. Bowl haircut. He was smokin'. My ardor was, sadly, unrequited. He was probably too busy building a space shuttle replica and knew that being involved with a girl would drag his grades down. He was the sort of geek who got shoved into his locker a lot. His abuses only made me love him more. After 8th grade, he & his family moved to North Carolina.

Bobby M, you coulda been a Beastie Boy. Here's to all the Beastie Geeks who don't need model looks & societal mores to make it big & flip girls' stomachs everywhere.

Well, unless I stay home. Unfortunately, I did not stay home today.

I wish I was here:


Now accepting donations for a big ass tub. I imagine I'd have to install it in my laundry room, but that's ok. I can live with that.

I am almost done with the Slipperiest Scarf Ever, made with electric blue Flash & peacock-ey Eros. Very simple pattern - just YO, k2tog, however, it is SLICK and with all the hairy Flash and railroad ribbon, it requires mindfulness. Mindful you get both strands, mindful you don't pull through the gap in the railroad, mindful you don't drop a needle & have all the stitches fall off.
Mondays are not so great for Mindfulness, but I hope to finish it tonight. Then, it's a stunning chihuahua sweater, followed by the poncho!

Well, the baby shower yesterday was wonderful. It was out at the ends of the Earth, yet it was wonderful. I didn't get a pic of the hooded baby sweater, but she loved it! Her MIL, Betty, is also a knitter, and from the stories I've heard, a bit wonkers. So imagine my astonishment to hear the first thing Betty says to me: "I like your style, Jennifer. You're my kind of person." I was terrified Julie might disown me as her friend. She can't remember any stories she's told her to create an opinion of me, either. Oh well! I figured one nutty Betty was going to be the max for the day. {ooooh, foreshadowing!}

So since I was already skirting the edge of the Universe, a.k.a., Olathe, I decided to zip over to Knit-Wit & see about some Koigu. That store is always BURSTING at the seams between people & yarn, and they'd just gotten a huge new shipment in, so boxes spilled over with bags of yarn. Ordinarily, that'd be fun. But it was already after 2, I had a long journey home, and I just wanted some Koigu. I couldn't find it. So I found me some Squiggle, and because the cube holding it was bursting, I ended up buying a couple of skeins (and dropping a couple more on the floor because I was afraid if I continued to try & put them back, I would topple everything!) - they will be a novelty scarf. Color: Cool Jazz


The only koigu they had was clearanced out, and in mostly hideous colorways or solids. Not fun. I bought one skein for a tie for James, and then picked out a couple of Waterspun skeins in a periwinkle variegated for the pigtail hat. I'll look like a complete & utter goofball in that hat, and I embrace it. I also bought some inexpensive alpaca wool in scarlet & gold for that chihuahua sweater for Monica.

So, as I'm paying, I spot this woman who looks familiar. It's Betty the Hater! OMG! What do I do? Pelt her with skeins of yarn? Linebacker-check her into the bookcase by the door? Shout obscenities? Knit some scarlet i-cord into the letter "H" and staple it to her t-shirt? I took a page from Ghandi and paid for my stuff & left.
Then I went to Pier 1 & cut my finger on a basket, jammed a splinter in so deep I couldn't remove it! I bought the baskets I had picked out & fled there as well. I should have gotten the "injured customer" discount, just like students get. Why do they do that? Show your student ID & get 15% off! Well, I work hard for the money (oo oo, oo oo) & I'd like to save!

Today is gonna be a blur. I've already been to the ATM, car wash, gas station & grocery store. Loads of cleaning to do, homemade pizza for dinner with Roger & David, prep tomatoes for sauce for tomorrow to cook in the crock pot, uh, more cleaning, and then collapse. And the work week will begin again! Let's hope it's a little less cliquey & little more fun this time.

Well, hubby put the mail in two piles last night, so I didn't discover the Knitter's magazine patiently waiting for me at the bottom of the heap until this morning! There's not a single sweater in it I'd want to knit, but hey, I love to look & get ideas. There is one hat that WILL be mine:



And, it's out of Koigu, so I can jump on
Kristin's Obsession Train

Today is Julie's baby shower, I'm going to snap a pic of the baby sweater I knit for her & get it posted; I also need to wind the Cascade 220 so I can get crankin' on the felted door mitten sample for

The Yarn Shop and More


I'm excited to teach classes there this Fall! I hope I don't get so excited I trip & stab myself with a straight needle or somethin'.
This weekend is off to a great start, because American Family Insurance sent me a check for $557 because apparently they had my old apartment in the wrong "zone" and their new software caught the glitch. Hooray for new software! And it makes my $164 "I'm starving & had the worst day EVER" shopping spree at Target last night a little easier to swallow. (Granted, half of my purchases were home needs like dish soap, a fan (on clearance!), a new padlock for the kennel, heat patches for JWo's ankle, color printer ink (what's with the highway robbery on the printer ink. I swear sometimes just buying a new printer would be cheaper). The rest was snacky candy stuff, mac n cheese, baby presents & wrapping materials for today, and now that I really think about it, there wasn't anything truly delightful just for me! Hrmph! I guess that's why I have to buy something today then, eh?

I miss Lizzie Lou. I am envious of Shelley, who is visiting her this weekend. I hope they call me! They'll probably wait until they're in Crate & Barrel so we can pour the kosher rock salt right directly into the wound.

I think it means something if, while watching VH1 Classic, I have flipped out over hearing the Sisters of Mercy. Man I was into them. The lead singer does look uh, pretty Goth.
"Some People get by..... with a little understanding...... Some People Get By..... with a whole lot more......" heh. JWo just said, "Who the F is this?" and I replied, "It's the F'in' Sisters of Mercy and they F'in' rock!"


Sisters of Mercy

But then, I also groove to the Scissor Sisters. Go figgah.
They're not exactly sisters to the Sisters of Mercy. Think any of 'em are gay?


http://www.universalrecords.com/quicktime/scissorsisters/

Because www.scissorsisters.com ain't workin'.

Did I miss the bus to GothLand? I didn't think I was so classifiable.


Which flock do you follow?
this quiz was made by alanna

I just realized that the crux, the very center of my insecurities, the little voice inside that says "you're not good enough" - oh my god, that is the mantra and nature of advertising! on all levels, of course, and you could say the big level is obvious - you, stupid consumer demographic Segment Two, need this powerfully strong deodorant to attract a mate because you are lacking in mate-attracting skills, and our deodorant will help you evolve and disguise all your shortcomings at the same time! Buy now! here's a coupon. - but on the smaller, day-to-day level, oh my gosh, it is pervasive! I chatted with the Dawgg about this, and we agree: we're all so human and frail it just sucks sometimes.
And I should note that I don't think this is inherent to me. I think it's just the nature of the NuBeast, a.k.a., corporate culture in America right now. Where fewer people are doing more work, and everyone's running as fast as they can - and the most they can do is look fearfully over their shoulder, hoping that their own job isn't in danger & maybe that wounded zebra in accounting will distract the Lions of Management long enough to get into those trees and hide. I imagine the people of Enron were much like surprised water buffalo & disheartened to discover their oasis teeming with ravenous crocodilia!
I'm in an excellent mood. I love this weather, (cool, cloudy, ever-threatening rain), I have my shopping list made, and my hubby can walk today with so much more ease than the past three days. We are eating Thai food tonight. The darkness has lifted. I still have garlic breath from lunch and I don't care. Perhaps a little chocolate from my Drawer of Contentment will help everything be that much happier.

"You can't be a nonconformist if you don't drink coffee." 

Well. My yarn dye-lot debacle disaster detrimental experience has been resolved, sorta. I finally was able to talk to Lori and she was profusely apologetic. This was desired result #1. Isn't it usually, before we got lawyers involved? You just want recognition. For a job well-done, for the pain you're in, for having tried. In this case, for the umpteen hours spent knitting to discover your yarn is two different dye lots. Anyway, they're going to research how I can dye my garment, once I get it finished, and after many wrangling arounds of what to do to make me happy, I decided not to be the HaterBeyotch and said 25% off my next order would be just swell. I have a feeling that no matter what I buy, those dye lots are gonna match!
So, I guess I'll have to play around and decide what to spend more money on with them - I have GOT to knit the poncho though, so what my next project for me should be is an unknown.
And sort of a victory, James is going to the doctor this afternoon. I'm sure he will not be happy with the experience, but he is not a woman and therefore doesn't use a speculum to gauge the level of awfulness for doctor visits. Now if only I could cut that damned padlock off the dog kennel. I am not strong enough and that makes me angry. I did not try to burst the padlock with my steely angry glare, however, because I don't think my powers have grown, and my computer at work has not exploded yet - and it's under that glare a lot longer than the dog kennel.
It's Craft Lunch Day, so I need to get some lunch, and then do a li'l decorative scarf knitting!

I'm going to not be such a hater today. However, let's get the hate out of the way. Things that are wrong with today:
1. James is on crutches & therefore I am responsible for all ambulatory activity. This means taking care of the dogs, and since James has lost the key to the (locked) kennel, the only way to put the dogs up is to LIFT the kennel off the concrete on the far corner,and this morning, Miss Polly decided she just didn't want to go under. My neighbors probably are praying for me still, given the foul stream of Curse that I did not Edit and in fact, Shouted. As sweat was running in my eyes.
A few Thwacks later & she is now safely inside her kennel.
2. --radio edit ---
3. My onion breath
4. My headache
5. All this work!

Now, the good stuff.
1. James talked to (and showed his ankle to) Sarah's fiance', who's in school for Physical Therapy & he said it isn't his Achilles Tendon, but either a heel spur or a small tendon that goes to the heel. Excellent. He also said a doctor would just say, "Stay off of it." So, crutches, good investment!
2. Got a call from my insurance agent, Ted Wheeler. Ted's the bomb. I always want to shop around & then I talk to Ted & his service is Grade A. He had better news - they've adjusted zones & apparently for a couple years I was overpaying in insurance! So I'm getting a check for a couple hundred dollars. Yay!
3. I forgot to input round 2 rates for one of my stations, so I may be making more progress than earlier thought!
4. I now have the greatest assistant ever helping me with my paper palace, and she is doing an awesome job, which helps me do a better job on the bigger stuff!
5. Teaching Tunisian crochet was fun last night.
6. Diet Coke with Lime. I loves it.
7. BOLT CUTTERS. They will be my salvation. And also help me solve Bad Issue #1, because I will cut that padlock off and put in a new one, with numerous keys, and the main key will be on a small boat anchor so it is not easily LOST!

Well, the end of the work day is nearly here. I have just taken 3 Tylenol, which will hopefully sustain me through my volunteering tonight, and I need to remember to stop at Roger & David's to get my makeup bag so I can once again, be pretty.

Today, I am a very tired hater. I am stuck in a bad spot & all I hear is the tape "I cannot do anything right." I think sometimes I just stop trying because it's simpler to sit & fail than to be active & fail. But then I'll turn into that lady who's skin grew into her sofa & they had to cut her out of it. And then she died. Badness.

I do not enjoy depression. (OH, scoff. I know there are some out there who practically revel in it. But no, they're not truly happy.)

I feel like work & life are big giant boulders, and while they are not bouncing down the mountain to land on my head, I feel like I'm wedged under them & my shoulders & chest are aching. I think that if I were an Army Ranger, this is what, say, hour 52 feels like on that no-sleep week of training. I am automatically piloting my life. It sucks.

I ended my week informing James that everyone is out to get me, him included. The first half of the week was him gittin' me, then people at work lined up. Conspiracies abound. I know that muther F'er in that white van that nearly ran over Kristin was really coming for me. All signs point to a need for serious hibernation from society, living in a yurt, and taking baths in hot springs with mud.
Oh, wait, I can't, we have James' family reunion tomorrow! Yippee! (these things are always hard, I never remember anyone, because we only go every other year it seems, and I don't have any history with them.) I am taking the remaining pickles I made (thanks Martha, the zucchini pickles were a HIT.) Then it's celebrate James' birthday on sunday, complete with a trip to the dog track (that's new to me), PF Chang's (ok, I'll stay in society through Sunday) and cake & ice cream & Six Feet Under. Somewhere in there I have to finish furry mittens for felting (if only my name were Fiona!) , do a TON of work I brought home (oh lord, I just can't wait! death, take me now! wait! lettuce wraps & Costco cake await! I'll do the work), and then the 800 other home things I never do: laundry, vacuuming, gardening, petkeeping (martha! send that dude over to wash my beasts), and have I mentioned the entire storage unit we've unloaded in the garage that IS ALL MINE? That remains to be sorted through, and where is that Mary Poppins wench when you need her? Spoonful of sugar won't make this chore list go down, more like half a bottle of Bombay Sapphire.
The good news is, the mitten's going FAST.
The bad news is, the Chiefs defense SUCK'T in their pre-season game. They must have many conspiracy people working against them. Too.
The good news is, my Auntie Karen did not get hit by the hurricane & they are safe.
There are many good things, I know this. I just get tired, and this was a week of Extraordinary Picking Upon My Nerves Like a Banjo, and I do not need another cross-eyed inbred young man on a bridge plucking out the rythym of my life next week.
We watched part one of Kill Bill tonight, and only Uma can make a canary-yellow track suit look good. I think if I got me some Okinawa steel, people at work might quit messin' with me. Maybe they'd start calling me "The Czarina" (like "The Bride"), too, and then maybe I'd grow to be 6' tall and have willowy limbs & really long toes, just like Uma. But then I'd have to deal with Quentin's obsession, and as much as I love his movies, I do not need someone like that obsessed with me on top of everything else. Plus I'd probably be too tall to comfortably drive the Civic.
Hey, it's Friday the 13th. No wonder this week blew.

Can I just say the DQ commercials are flippin' hilarious? It only took ten+ years since I worked on that damn account, and they didn't even have to use a monkey.


Julia Child, we will miss you. What a life lived, though. Bravo.

Walking towards the small kitchen, carrying my EMPTY Diet Coke with Lime can, that I had just finished dramatically crushing in front of Renee' and Troy to illustrate the stress levels plaguing our department & Stephanie passed me, and chirped, "Goin' to put that in the ice machine?"

I was literally doubled over, which is probably a frightening sight to see, however, it gave me great amusement and I will take it wherever I can git it 'round here. (See previous post about yesterday's coke-in-the-ice-machine. It still won't be as funny to you. Promise.)

The second funny (Fright!) of the day came from Kristin, Princess of Yarn (I am the Czarina because I need to be foreign.) http://www.ptleader.com/main.asp?SectionID=36&SubSectionID=55&ArticleID=10138 Dudes & Dudettes everywhere, make SURE your metal needles have not been packed with gunpowder, and I forsee this tragic incident having a ripple effect BACK through the airline industry and the FAA banning the ol' knittin' needles again from air travel. Because it wouldn't be easier to just garrotte somebody with a circular needle, I'd like to try to pierce somebody's aorta with a size 0 needle that I've made razor sharp. Or create a dynamically exploding, highly targeted weapon by jamming C4 into the barrel of the needle. Nobody will believe you're serious when you try to set a needle up to their head, declaring you MUST be flown to Tahiti right NOW. Whatever. I'm beginning to think that everything, virtually EVERYTHING in this world (or at least this country) is sustained by focusing on nit-pickley little shit that won't truly make a difference but creates volumes upon volumes of busy work for managerial types to "supervise" and none of the really goddamn important stuff gets attended to, because THAT is too hard. I do it, everybody does it, but you know what? People who make shitloads more money than me need to not do it, and focus on the hard stuff & get it figured out so the rest of us stop having tension headaches that start right about now.

Morrissey's singing about the Girlfriend in a Coma. That takes me back to such a simpler time. A time when you looked at the clock and said, "Yes, I can go to the Bar right now for Happy Hour, I will skip this godAwful Physiology of the Brain class!" God I hope if I ever end up in a Coma, James does not pull the plug on me.
OH now on Retro Flashback at Lunch it's "Detachable Penis". My Uterus blogging friend might enjoy that as a theme song?

1. Finish the tartalette scarf for Phyllis (birthday: 8/16)
2. Knit & felt Fuzzy Mittens for Yarn Store/Class. Yarn: Cascade 220 in pink, plus a furry pink eyelash.
3. Knit & Felt Door Mitten for Yarn Store/Class. Yarn: Cascade 220 in bright cheery red.
4. Knit (uhhh, why do I keep putting "KNIT" as the active verb.) a poncho.
segue: Yes. Everybody under the sun will be sporting a poncho, and I figure with a quicky-trippy YO, k2 tog, knit the next row kinda pattern, I too, can sport a poncho of size. I plan to use my elann.com mohair that is a blend of raspberries & browns (I know, I do an internal "YIKES" every time I think about it, as I own nothing, repeat, NOTHING brown.) I am pairing the mohair with Lamb's Pride in fuchsia, to dominate the browns in their cheery bright pinkness and sustain the raspberries in the mohair. I hope it all works out.
5. A wool Manly Sweater for my hubby. This will be a labor o' love! I will adapt Lucy Neatby's Big Gent's Sweater pattern, calculate short rows for his buddha belly, and as much as knitting in the round can be fun & satisfying, I'm thinking this will have to be knit in pieces. Here's the logic. A. Need seams for this guy. This is an out-in-the-woods, on-the-lake hunting sweater. Seams will give it structure. B. Finishing each piece will give me greater satisfaction. Yarn: Acres of 100% wool in a dark gray. Brandname escapes me. Very rustic ball bands, as I recall.

Oh, don't be fooled. I probably have enough yarn, unfinished objects, and patterns to do a list totalling well over 100. The funny thing is, with all my stash & needles, I did NOT have a set of #11 DP's! So I risked a ticket (parking in the no parking zone/fire hydrant spot in front of the Studio over lunch) & bought some today. James just laughed at me. Eventually, I will own the world & all the needles and yarn will be MINE, MINE MINE I telll you! MOOHAHAHAHAHA!

On a completely different note, somebody stashed an unopened can of Coke in the kitchen's ice machine this morning. Totally wigged me out. I live in squalor, I'll admit it. Dirt, germs, etc., don't normally get me too freaked out. But this just seemed to violate too many things. I give to you State's Evidence marked #1: The ice machine is not a flippin' COOLER! 2. People CONSUME the ice out of that machine, not put it in ziploc baggies and place it on their temples because they happen to work in a place that ignores morale as it circles the drain like the graying hair from your temples circles the drain in the shower. 3. People just seem to think they can do whatever the F they want because they want it and screw everybody else. A witness "outed" the culprit & now I do fear for my safety, however, I do weigh about 3x the perpetrator's freshly-showered weigh-in weight, so I will trust in my ability to sit on her and subdue her, should a knife fight take place in the parking garage. God help me if it happens in the parking garage though, because the "security guards", and we use the word "security" quite loosely, are comprised of a man who could star in the Dukes of Hazzard - and maybe did - a woman who never moves & stares out the door like a little nutcracker doll each night, and then - oh god help me if it's his shift - the man who is the father of the Dukes of Hazzard security guard, and sports about 4 teeth. Since he mostly smokes, I don't think he needs his teeth.

Well, I am frightened about the volume of work descending upon me, and I wish it were just my knitting list that were weighing on me. OH I have to go to bed, Reno 911 is back on as a repeat, and I love love love that show, but I DVR'd it so I should watch it at a time when I don't need immediate sleep, like now, 11:31 p.m. CST!

I wrote a whole post and then tried to publish the Julia Stiles' scarf in it, and lost my whole damn blog. Anyway, the curse of being a knitter is to delight in all things knitted, even at the movies. I coveted her scarf, it looks very Colinette-y!

Here's the scarf. Beeee-yooo-tiful! 

Felted tote ...... Lamb's Pride Bulky, embellished with way too many beads. (The amount of beads work, it was the afternoon spent sewing them all on....!) 

This was a toy I made for a baby shower at work: I dubbed him "Spike"! 

Well, I've been way behind on the ol' Ample Knitters list. And I feel like such a user-beyotch, because I've posted two desperate pleas for help in the past month, without staying caught up on everything. However, it's gotten so crazy with the whole "what's OT, don't post OT, Label your OT" blah-de-de-blah and with a list member I like leaving over it, I'm glad I was behind when it was happening! I think I'd have made the cranky complainers even MORE if they got a good dose of my rancor. Well, no sense in spending any more on that.
I did put my Diva cardigan away for now. I will need to finish the sleeves, do all the trim & then - deep breath - knit some MORE swatch, do a practice swatch for dyeing, and then dye the whole thing. I still have not heard anything from YarnXpress, which honks me off, isn't it funny, how the more time that goes by, the more I just want a FREAKIN' apology for sending me two bags of different dye lots! WAH WAH WAH! I'm having a bitchy pity party! Bring some Doritos!
So right now, I'm knitting THE cutest baby sweater for my friend Julie, who is finally having the baby they tried so hard to "get". I told her at lunch yesterday that I am unnaturally excited about her pregnancy. I just feel like I understand how much she wanted this, and how disappointed they've been until the last go-round when the results were positive, it just feels like such a perfect blessing. People who want to have children as much as they do should have them! And a little girl - oh, the outfits I get to make her! :) So I'll post what sort of yarn, I got it at the Studio during their sale, it's hot hot pink wrapped with a bunch of other colors. I also am enamored with the sweater Kristin knit for Janice's baby - it's SO flippin' cute. Baby sweaters are the best because, UNLIKE a PLUS-SIZED CARDIGAN KNIT IN THE ROUND, they don't take UMPTEEN HOURS and then if you discover the dye lots are DIFFERENT, it's not the end of the freakin' UNIVERSE!
WEll, rant off. I'm off to play dominoes online against my hubby. He'll probably kick my patoot, because I'm out of practice at adding quickly in my head. :)

Well, I don't know what the dealy-o is. It's way late, I'm usually comatose-asleep by this point. I think part of it is a fear of re-entering the dream I left this morning - I was shot in my leg by a mugger, and it was just frame after frame of franticness. I don't remember much else, just immense pain, and panic. James seems to be staying asleep though. I hope he gets back on a schedule soon or he's going to have a lot of trouble once school starts.
On other notes, I am pissed OFF at an online yarn retailer right now, because I ordered two bags of Diva ribbon yarn in the same color, and why would they send me two different dye lots? Oh, can't answer that question? Me neither. And a nice, painful way for me to learn a lesson about double-checking dye lots, since my ribbon cardigan in the round is done except for sleeves - complete with a faint color change mid-shoulder. So now I'm hoping I can unify the look by dyeing it - RIT should work, it's a wool/polyamide blend, so I guess I'm just gonna finish the sleeves & hope for the best. It pisses me off though, all that work, and makes me wanna chuck it. Except it also makes me want like $80 discount on my next purchase from them, since that's about what I spent on this yarn. I am looking forward to hearing back from them to see if I ever buy from them again.
On a sunnier, happier note, I have oodles of mohair from elann.com, love them, and pairing it with some fuchsia Brown Sheep, I have the uber-accessory of the season in my head, a poncho. I guess everyone else is gonna have a poncho, so I better figure out if I'm doing the capelet sort or the rectangle sort. Everything I've read about Big Girl Design, a shaped one is better, but I like the pointy-ness from the squares. So, I must continue digging up designs.
I hate how weekends go so fast, ya know? I need to figure out what other knitting classes I want to teach at the Yarn Store & More, and I need to catch up with Rob when he's back in town on Monday. We have so much cleaning to do tomorrow, plus I'm going to make pico de gallo with roasted garlic - YUM. I hope Six Feet Under is a good episode, too. The DVR has been a fabulous decision, if I dare pat myself on the back excessively. I can keep up with my soaps without them piling up for 5 hours on the weekend, what with the stop & save feature that lets me pick back up watching it where I left off! woo hoo! Gotta love the gadgets.
Well, I should try to go back & get some sleep. My mind was just whirring too much, and with Polly gnawing away on her nylabone, I couldn't let go to sink into sleep. Oh hell, I also need to do trivia for the company picnic, and I need to figure out if I'm doing something for the talent show. Damn damn damn. More to do tomorrow! I can't wait to talk to Liz about Terry's resignation - I miss my lizzie-lou-hou!