PlazaJen: Passion Knit

I told the Wo this morning I had a Vacation Hangover, and he surmised that instead, it could very likely be Bacon Withdrawal. In any event, I've sported a faint headache for the day, and been a little confused about what day it actually is. I came in to work halfway through the day, and diligently plowed through the 15 voicemails I'd gotten. I was unable to change my VM greeting before I left, because the fire alarm was going off! And I have some impairment and am unable to access our voicemail remotely, something about hitting the star key rapidly and I don't know what I'm doing wrong but I end up leaving myself multiple hang-ups.

This morning sent us out to apply for our passports; I should say, JWo got his application in, because we discovered when we got to the good post office, that I had neglected to bring MY birth certificate, but instead had both of his in an envelope. So we toodled back home, I hunted for mine, trying not to just fall apart out of frustration and bacon withdrawal, and then I went off to the bank to put everything else in the safety deposit box, which was a bit of a hassle because they had our account flagged again but it was simply out of order filing-wise, not because I needed to sign something (again.) But it took fifteen minutes of two bank employees running around looking in every available file drawer to figure it out. I exited the bank thinking that this did NOT bode well for my trip to the Altercation Post Office, the one where I was verbally abused by a drunk while the postal employee served him coffee? Which is the same one where a woman was beaten with a 2x4 one morning when she was checking her mailbox? So you can understand why perhaps I was not rolling in there as the local optimists chapter president. The line? It was so, so long. Maybe that was the WAIT, there were only three people in front of me. I conjectured that the hippie dude was selling off his comic books on eBay and this was his big shipping day. I have no idea what the old dude in front of me was shipping, but Darth Vader was behind me in line, breathing audibly, and he stood about four inches back from me. No matter how I moved to increase my bubble. And believe you me, my bubble is kinda big right now. He was a nice old man, Darth Vader, and he was mostly at the post office for socialization. Weather was a safe subject, and he wheezed and whistled and waxed rhapsodic about the heat, and I was grateful that after one more person, he would be forced to maintain a five-foot berth from my bubble. Poor dude. I wish I could have been more chipper and chatty, but again. No bacon today.
The process for getting my passport application done went so quickly even the postal worker thought she'd made a mistake. Typing that now makes a bit uh, nervous, but since I'd watched all the steps down in Martin City on JWo's, I know that we did all the same steps & I paid for everything I was supposed to - so now the race will be on, to see if there really is a difference between post offices and if one will come before the other. My postal worker couldn't have been nicer, and nobody stank like MD 20/20 while screaming rude things at me, so perhaps we've reached a turning point with the Wornall station!
I titled this blog purgatory because I feel caught between Vacation (Bacon) Life and Normal Routine Life. I have other things to do, out of my routine, this week, because Thursday is the Wo's birthday, and I'm paranoid I'll forget them in my half-life half-death no-bacon state. I need another night of sleep and maybe some Bacon DeTox tea and hopefully normal will be returning to Jenville.
Oh, speaking of Jen this and Jen that, we determined on our vacation that Jenapalooza would feature many great bands. Cake, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Journey, Cyndi Lauper, maybe Snow Patrol? and I can't remember who else right now. I'm adding Tom Petty to that list, because they are my official Backyard Band. (You know, a band you'd like to have permanently in your back yard.) The best part of having Jenapalooza come to your town, would be listening to me sing along to all those great songs, because like, I don't really worry so much about the words? As written out by the artist? I'm more about the tune. The melody. Mmhm! Leonard Bernstein!



This is TOTALLY ME. Now. Start begging Ticketmaster to bring Jenapalooza to your hometown!