PlazaJen: Passion Knit

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Breaking Point

I'm not blowing up or falling apart, it's just.... I dunno. I'm all irritable and sharp edges and bristly rough surfaces. I usually have a bout of insomnia this time of year, a restlessness that simmers below my skin, but I haven't had any problems sleeping per se. Maybe it's coming out in other ways. I'm fed up with bullshit, I'm adapting to my "new" eyeballs, work is picking back up, and I wonder sometimes when one area of our life becomes stable if we start walking back out towards the edges, trying to find the place where the tipping point begins anew. At least I realize what I'm doing, and I'm not picking fights with my husband as a form of release! I've just got hassle-y things to deal with and I'm extremely impatient. We got new insurance, and it took forever to get our ID cards, we have to go get new prescriptions for EVERYthing to move it over between mail-order systems, the provider's website is cumbersome, and yet they don't want to do paper-anything, they want you to do everything on-line. Hi. I have a suggestion for you: make your website WORK before you go paperless, dipshits. See? Just slicing through the clutter, I am.
I get a little haphazard when I'm in this place, making choices and decisions with a little more "recklessness" - not like driving on two wheels or careening down the Ward Parkway median or nothin', more along the lines of being less precise, weighing all my options and possible outcomes less, going with my gut more than my mind.

Oddly enough, it feels ok.
posted by PlazaJen, 3:40 PM