PlazaJen: Passion Knit

Friday, November 12, 2004

Breathe in, Breath out

So, we are just past the three-week mile marker for James & his bi-Pap machine. It is a miraculous little device; I have dubbed it the "iron lung" in my head. It truly keeps him breathing through the night, unless he pulls his mask off, and then his snoring usually wakes me up & I have to tell him to put it back on. But even that has gotten less as time goes on. And within a week, I was seeing glimpses of my "old JWo", like he is shedding a skin that bound him and crippled him and his healthier, more-human self can re-emerge into the light. I've even flipped around and am sleeping side-by-side with him again. It's really nice. (It will be nicer once we get that damned headboard done!) Two nights ago, he held my hand as we lay there, waiting for sleep, and through his mask he said, "Thank you for being so patient." And without even thinking, I replied: "I'm patient because I love you." It is so nice to have that level of love & trust. I don't think I ever believed I'd find it with anyone, and now I don't know how I'd live without it. I've also become a much more patient person, because of my relationship with him, and as I've gotten older & less demanding that EVERYthing on earth go my way. Most of the time. :)
posted by PlazaJen, 2:40 PM