PlazaJen: Passion Knit

Monday, February 21, 2005

The Science of Sickness

Good thing I majored in art. I can talk and talk about science without being hindered by "stuff" - like research and studies and knowledge. So here are my groundless observations on the subject of a chest cold. This dissertation will involve the imaginary gnomes that inhabit my body and keep things running (or react when things are not well.) (I said I was an art major, peeps.)

I think it's interesting how our bodies can be both sweaty AND chilled at the same time. Talk about mixed messages, nerve endings! It's not like the internal body gnomes at Command Central aren't confused enough, they're getting one reading on the ticker tape saying "FREEZING HERE!" and from the same region a wire's coming through saying "EXCESSIVE SWEATING!" I find it repulsive that our bodies can generate so much sweat in bed when we're sick, it's as though one took a sponge bath IN bed. Without towels. Yeeecccchh.

Right now, I feel as though Tony Soprano & his crew went to town on my lower back with an assortment of Louisville Sluggers. I'm thinking that's a result of all of the attractive hyena-coughing I've been doing. But are they productive coughs, you ask? Oh, about half. And that's a whole 'nother arena. The body's ability to generate various colors and expel them is also fascinating. My mucus gnomes are in High Gear, shoveling the stuff into the Expelling Pipes and working overtime.

Hitching the sinuses up to the ears was simply brilliant. There's nothing like feeling those sinus tubes fill up and then recede a little bit. Not to mention how much it all affects your balance. It's like getting an amusement park ride for free, just sitting still. Wheee! The gnomes are less thrilled, as they do not like sudden shifts underfoot and the slipping and sliding across the breakroom floor.

My body gnomes are tired. We're all taking President's Day off, as a sick day. Bloody annoying, given how much work I've got sitting & waiting for me, and it will make the other days this week very stressful. But I know if I go through the very arduous task of dressing myself, driving in, finish one project & come home, I will have delayed my recovery by an exponentially-related amount of time. I have no idea if that even makes sense. Math gnome is hiding. Probably under the covers, wondering why it's so dank there.
posted by PlazaJen, 8:09 AM