PlazaJen: Passion Knit

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

It's Five O'Clock Someplace

All day, my happy yellow duck clock has been stopped at five 'til one. I had yesterday off, and it took me a while to notice His Duckness, stuckness in time.
Now, I've looked at that clock about 20x today, and been perpetually surprised EACH TIME. It was fine before lunch, because for that fleeting moment, time was moving really FAST. But now that it's 4:15 p.m., and I look up and see "12:55", I have a tiny moment of panicky confusion. Wha? Huh? God, this is a long day!
See, our computer clocks (something most people reference) are set to an incorrect clock. I know how to change it on my computer, but somehow the NETWORK manages to override it, and it overrides it with a time that's about ten minutes slow. Which means if you rely on it, you have to play MindGames with yourself so you get to meetings on time - something my husband is infamous for. His bedroom clock? 17 minutes fast. At one point, it was 28 minutes fast. His truck clock? Who knows. It's been anywhere from 11 to 30 minutes fast. I never know what the Real World time is when I look at his clocks. The man hates to be late. He told me, on our first date, that the only thing that could really make him mad would be someone being really late. Honestly, I didn't have a lot of long-term hope for our relationship at that point, because I'm terminally, criminally, and sometimes unapologetically LATE. (I was five minutes late for that same first date!) He has preached the virtues of being on time. He has offered Helpful Hints that could Assist Me. I prefer to state that I live in Reality, where I use the clock on our cable box, which is fed the time from some Naval Academy in Annapolis, and when I tried to change it, it took the cable representative three tries to get through to me that I COULDN'T CHANGE THE U.S. NAVAL CLOCKS IN MARYLAND. But I know that it is the REAL time and I don't have to do mathematical processes to know exactly what time it really IS. And I know that I'm late, by exactly how much, and I will apologize for it, when necessary. But, and I just looked at Mr. Duck again, and it's still 12:55, at least I am not, to quote Foreigner, playing HEAD GAMES with myself. Or that official clock in Annapolis. They won't let you, and I can testify to that.

posted by PlazaJen, 4:14 PM