PlazaJen: Passion Knit

Thursday, August 10, 2006

My eyes, my EYES! (II)

We've got some new business we've been working on, and last night, all I did was dream about lasik surgery. Well, for the first half of the night. I woke up multiple times, and each time was after I'd just had some lasik done. I'm actually considering the surgery, more seriously than I ever have before. I think one of my challenges that I didn't admit to is my own vanity. I feel like my glasses define my look, add character & personality. But the argument for being able to see the moment I open my eyes in the morning outweighs that vanity!

In any event, I didn't come here to tell you about THAT dream, but the other one, later in the night. I dreamt that (much like the gasoline crisis) there was a tomato supply crisis. And since much of my job involved chopping tomatoes, I panicked, quit my current job, and went BACK to my old agency in the same day. Without getting their sign-off on hiring me back. As soon as I got there & was waiting to talk to the powers-that-be, I realized I'd made a horrible, horrible mistake. I could weather this tomato crisis. I raced back to my current employer & hoped they hadn't discovered I'd left. Then I woke up.

Now, it's no shocker my old place is floating through my head - they just lost a big chunk of business, and everyone's buzzing - surprised and not surprised all at once. I still have some friends there, I still care about those people, and I hope they don't find themselves without jobs in six months. Or they find new ones in the meantime. When I think about some of the other people, I see the smugness, the clubbiness, the superiority complexes & apathy towards change, I hear the public statements to "be more creative! think beyond the numbers" and I remember the pounding down, dressing-down, near-hatred of me when I was told, "you're too creative! you just don't GET it! You get to the same conclusion but you don't do all the research to get there. You don't fit in."

And when I remember those words? And even though those bastard people probably won't pay the price (and the little people will) for the client loss? I'm ecstatic I'm chopping tomatoes someplace else.

I'd sworn I'd written a blog several years ago about how complacency kills - maybe I was too paranoid then? I did find a post referencing myself as the Ringleader of the Unhappiness Circus. Now I'm more the Ringleader of the Insane Ass-Clown Posse and our Fabulous Days of Hysterical Laughter. There's hope, people. It can, and does, change.
posted by PlazaJen, 7:02 AM